Individual Therapy and Family Counseling

FAQ > Marriage Counseling & Couples Therapy > How can I get the most out of Marriage Counseling or Couples Therapy?

Admit that a problem exists. How do you each define the problem? Take time to understand what the problem is and how it impacts you and the relationship. What are examples? How does it feel? If each person comes to counseling acknowledging, not denying the problem, then counseling will likely progress quicker.
Recognize that you might be contributing to the problem. A relationship is a system; both parts (each individual) of the system impact and relate to each other. Rarely is one person completely responsible for all of the problems that exist in the relationship. Owning your part in the problem will put your relationship in a better place as you start into the counseling process!
Be willing to consider making some behavioral changes, or taking some action steps. Having willingness to make changes in the way you act will take your relationship towards further progress during counseling.
Be careful of expectations you have of your therapist. If you are looking to your counselor to “fix” the problem, know that they cannot perform magic in your marriage! A counselor will guide, explore and help to increase awareness of the issues and triggers in the marriage but they have no magic wand! The counselor will teach you new skills and tools to use in your relationship, but you are responsible for implementing them.
Be patient! Counseling will take time to assess the problem and begin working towards your goals. How long counseling lasts depends on how long the problem has existed, individuals’ willingness to change, and the nature of the problems. The time in counseling is well worth it though; it's a life long investment!