Yes, you can go to counseling by yourself! Sometimes taking that first step to get help in counseling can be the catalyst for your spouse to acknowledge the problem and desire change themselves. When one person begins to change their behaviors, attitudes, and reactions in the relationship, the other individual will notice (eventually)! You can work to make the necessary changes within yourself and learn how to cope within your relationship through the counseling process. You can benefit by learning in counseling more about yourself, your reactions and your behavior in the relationship. You may also find that through counseling you feel less stress, sadness, anxiety and tension and are able to respond in more positive, healthy ways to the actions of others.